Tuesday, June 30

Too good to be true

I'm going through a "low" phase of self-doubt, where I beat myself down and wallow in self-pity. Please pardon me. Friedrich Nietzsche - “The existence of forgetting has never been proved: we only know that some things do not come to our mind when we want them to." All the problems seemed to crash over the weekend. Sometimes, I'd rather block the pain and not confront these obstacles. That is why my dear friends, I don't voice them out to burden you. I understand that is not how things are supposed to work but I am used to this protocol, perhaps since young. It runs in the family. I feel like I'm walking elevator circles these days - not knowing where to stand after pressing the elevator button and just eyeing every door awkwardly. Bikram last night helped though. It was my first 7:30pm session, a little late but was great, because limbs were more flex than they are in the morning. My favorite part of night classes is lying on the mat after all the torture, with just a tiny light on in the room breathing in the still stale air while the cars and people whizz past downstairs. The peeps were unavailable at night but I can understand why. It must be the nice night rain, because I wish I was in bed with some hot cocoa. But still, I had some nice quiet moments walking home blasting some Duran Duran and Starship.

Optimism Positivity!
Maybe it's me looking through the x'mas photos again and having serious bouts of withdrawals. Maybe it's me wondering how I can ever be debt-free. Maybe it's me thinking whether it's worth it for things to be the same again. Maybe it's how they are not speaking to each other again. Maybe it's the effect of staying at home too much without proper employment.

Anyways, I'm just going to smile when it hurts the most. Chin up! I am jojotee! Today is going to be better already I know, because I woke up to me accidentally pressing a smiley in my phone while I was asleep (whatever happened to good morning messages)! My hair is in-place which is nice, and I just had my Special K for brunch. And best is, I have my date with qingren after Bikram! I am looking forward to chill and go enjoy some wind with cheap GloriaJeans. After which, it's finally time for my revenge muahaha.

I spent my entire Saturday downloading all 6CDs worth of tracks off this album. It is worth it I tell you! I love almost every single track and found some "new" songs I like.

Photobucket Photobucket

And I found my song finally!

Looking in your eyes I see a paradise
This world that Ive found
Is too good to be true
Standing here beside you
Want so much to give you
This love in my heart that Im feeling for you

Let em say were crazy, I dont care about that
Put your hand in my hand baby
Dont ever look back
Let the world around us just fall apart
Baby we can make it if were heart to heart

And we can build this dream together
Standing strong forever
Nothings gonna stop us now
And if this world runs out of lovers
Well still have each other
Nothings gonna stop us, nothings gonna stop us now

Im so glad I found you
Im not gonna lose you
Whatever it takes I will stay here with you
Take it to the good times
See it through the bad times
Whatever it takes is what Im gonna do

I go crazy whenever this song comes on.

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